“Whoever is generous with the poor lends to the Lord and he will repay him for his deed. Whoever shuts their ears to the cry of the poor will also cry out and not be answered.“ Proverbs 19:17; 21:13
Dearest Chloe and Phoebe,
The Bible is not as esoteric as some people think. Neglect a fellow brother or sister in need, and God will neglect to hear your prayers. It’s simple.
Any brute person can throw change at a homeless person. But the gentle manner, and in the end, the frequency in which a gift is given, will be determined by the condition of your heart.
As your mom, I care that you, more than anyone else, live in abundance and fulfillment. The reason why I’m advising that you to live a generous life is not only because it’s the right thing to do, but so that you can experience an overflow of God’s blessing in your life.
Here are three ways to prime your heart for generosity.
1. Identify with people in need. It’s not enough to sympathize with someone and feel sorry for them. The only true way to condition your heart for generosity is to identify with someone in need. In other words, consider them your equal.
Both of you, for the most part, have been born into privilege. You may not agree. Many of our friends have more. But the friends you’ve been exposed to at lavish birthday parties is a small sampling. Most of the world is concerned with where their next meal is coming from.
You on the other hand have shelter, food, a vast extension of people who love you and parents who not only love you, but have the ability to fight to make sure fairness, justice and opportunity is purveyed to you. You’ll have the chance to learn and develops skills. In all likelihood, you’ll have something to offer the world. And while this may require hard work, you must remember you will not have been self made. Nobody ever really is.
So when you meet someone less fortunate, be very careful about forming opinions. It’s tempting to buy the notion that you have what you have because you’ve earned it. And they are where they are because of their poor choices or lack of work ethic. People are lured to believe this not for its logic, but because it frees them from responsibility.
But factor in chemical imbalance, an unstable home life, economic hardship, and anyone can be made vulnerable enough to make poor choices. Not to mention there are few places in this world where effort leads to a direct one-to-one pay off. Someone with stellar math skills may benefit tremendously in Wall Street today, but those same math skills will not have benefited him much during eighth century Tibet. Or consider a situation much closer to home.
You are both of South Korean descent. But our South Korean origin is only three generations deep. Both sets of grandparents on your father’s side and my side were fortunate to have traversed down to the south before the war broke out. Our grandparents, your great grandparents, had brothers and sisters who never made it down. I remember hearing grandpa talk about how he never saw some of his brothers and sisters again after the war. They were stuck in what is now known as North Korea, the most repressive regime in the modern world.
A small twist of fate could’ve landed all of us on the other side, where we would be living much, much different lives. No amount of effort there could garner accolades or win you the freedom to pursue your dreams. No, the same people, who have become entrepreneurs, doctors and lawyers might be scrounging for food under a dictatorship with no freedom to enjoy even the most basic of human rights.
So when you see a homeless person on a street, or someone less fortunate than you, have this attitude of refined wisdom and humility, as someone combed, versed and educated enough to understand that no two people could ever walk the same two miles. Then see your own vulnerability in them.
2. Trust the Lord. Trust comes from intimacy. You can’t trust someone blindly, not even God. Especially God. Before you can make giving a life-long discipline, you must first experience his love and provision. So spend time with him each day.
Another reason why trust is important is because you will go through seasons of drought. Just because God hears your prayers, doesn’t mean he’ll answer them.
“There are more tears shed over answered prayers than unanswered ones,” the author Truman Capote once said.
This is one of mommy’s all-time favorite quotes. I reflect on some of my prayers growing up. And I shudder at the thought that God might’ve answered some of them. I was downright defiant many times. He could’ve easily given into my antics and answered my demands just to prove the point that I didn’t know what was best for me after all. He could’ve said, “I told you so.” Instead, he withheld many of my prayers to save me from myself. It’s quite possible I may not be married to your father, an amazing man, without God’s guidance in my life.
So learn to trust God. Because if you wait for worldly security to give, it will never happen.
3. Give, however small. Do you know what’s needed to prompt the next act of generosity? A prior act of generosity. In other words, you need to give in order to condition your heart for more giving. The Bible says your heart is where your treasure is. It’s been said that the at first the Nazi’s killed the Jews because they hated them. But then they killed the Jews because they hated them. Your initial actions may be inspired by some sentiment. But in the end, your sentiments are formed by your actions. Your love will grow towards those things you invest your time, energy and money in
Ever wonder why the God of the universe who owns everything under the sun asks us to give? Does God really need our bread crumbs? He asks us to give because he tests our hearts. He can use your two fish and five loaves of bread to feed a multitude of people. Don’t wait for the grand gesture to give. Give what you can. He looks at your heart.
So develop the discipline by opening up your heart and wallet from time to time as a way of saying thanks but also as a way of conditioning your heart to love people from all walks of life.
Always Tithe. Don’t rob your brothers and sisters by what you have, but don’t rob God either.
And when you give, give in private and not on stage at some charity function. If you’ve won the respect of peers by giving, you will have received your reward in full, God says.
So be generous. And God will wipe every tear from your face and store your whispered prayers in his heart. When the time will come for your wish to be granted, he will pour out unimaginable blessings far beyond your imagination. Nor will he fail to comfort, carry and shield you during seasons of emptiness. You will always be full, one way or another.